Storytime

[Irisa]

Write a paragraph, five sentences, continuing a story that the person above you has begun. Someone will follow your story up, and so on. It can be about anything. Randomness is applauded. I'll start:

Up on a hill lived a man named Bob. He had no teeth and slobbered everywhere constantly. Bob had a neighbor named Lilly who milked goats for a living. One day Lilly decided to bring Bob some goat milk. She brought her goat, Earl, over to Bob's house also.

[Miriel]

Now it just so happened that Lilly was very, very pretty. All the boys in town wanted her. Bob was single, but Lilly secretly wanted Bob, because she hated all those pretty boys. Bob didn't know this. Earl happened to be a very pretty goat.

Bob fell in love with the goat.

[Tismri]

But sadly, the goat did not recipricate Bob's feelings. He was crushed when Earl headbutted him out the door. He found that he became bitter and ran off to a farm down the road. Maggie the cow mooed his way. Bob stopped. It hit him then.

[Irisa]

Bob loved Maggie even more. Lilly had ran after him, and discovered this. She was enraged, and took out a machete she had in her back pocket, slaughtering Maggie. Bob watched in horror as his love became no more. Lilly laughed evilly, licking her lips in accomplishment. Maggie was dead, and now Bob would love her. She picked up Maggies's carcass, and threw it down a hill.

Irisa the dragon came and ate it.

[Miriel]

Bob ran down the hill, sobbing loudly. Suddenly, he came to a dog house labeled 'Fifi'. He knocked, and out came an ADORABLE little poodle. "I LOVE YOU!" He cried to the poodle, tore off her collar, and took her on a plane to Timbuktu so that Lilly would never find them.

Alas, it was not to be!

[Aren Dröttningu]

Lilly flew with wings she just happened to sprout and went in an angry rage to find Bob. Meanwhile, Bob was trying to get the poodle to make out with him. The poodle kept inching away from Bob and suddenly ran out into the street. Bob ran after her just to see her get hit with a car, sending her five hundred feet into the air. Bob ate a popsicle he named Poodle, then grew wings and flew.

And he ran into some air traffic.

[Miriel]

Now, it turns out that the FBI were looking for Bob because he had committed a crime earlier in his life and he had escaped. The air traffic her went to turned out to be the FBI airplanes. They arrested Bob, and then put him in court. They said, "Bob, you have committed a felony. Do you remember what it was?" And Bob said "Yes. I was going to be arrested for dog-earing the pages of library books." The judge said, "That's right!"

Why, oh why did Bob dog-ear those pages??

[Irisa]

It happened that Bob had dog-earred those pages because he was marking places, only there happened to be a lot of interesting places in one place. The book was entitled 'The Love of Goats.' And this is what lead him to fall in love with Earl. He told the judge this. The judge was sympathetic, and freed him immediately.

[Jeriah]

Now, this judge's name was Calamari Elifantal. He had a very depressing life. He grew up made fun of by other kid who called him "fishy elephant." Whenever fish sticks were served as school they called him a cannibal. This made him so angry that he went into law school.

[Illario Ceranthor]

Bob made the mistake of referring to the judge as a "fishy" guy. When this brought up horrible memories, the judge took his anger out on Bob. He sentenced him to a lifetime in jail. Only, he forgot to mention that he meant a human lifetime...